Gesargenplotzian Liturgical Calendar

Church of the Great Gesargenplotz

Provisional Liturgical Calendar

(adopted by the Council of Pembroke, 2 March AI 17)

3 January

Liberation Day (on which the GG ate the EE)

2 February

Groundhog Day (previously established)

22 February

Rabbit Day (when the rabbits play)

mid-March

Eatser, or Revelation Night, night of the full moon nearest March 14 (commemorating the revelation of the GG to the Chosen One) [if this night is clear in a given area, that area is said to be 'clear' for liturgical purposes for the entire year, otherwise the area is 'cloudy'. (the significance of this is unknown)]

19 April

Kite Day (on which Gesargenplotzians are urged to fly kites and to consider that life, like a kite, requires special conditions to operate at all, never lasts forever, but is sometimes worth the trouble anyway.)

5 May

Frolic Day (self-explanatory)

8 June

Princess of the Gerbils Day (on which to contemplate our sentience, which we owe to the EE, and which we have in common with other animals)

15 July

Poppin' Fresh Day

24 August

Dog Day (heretofore August had several dog days, but Gesargenplotzianism has reduced it to one)

29 September

Some Day (traditional time for reunion of Gesargenplotzian friends, who often part with the ritual expression "see you Some Day") (certain schismatics hold that this is properly Thumb Day)

13 October

Fledermaus Tag (scheduled to be redesignated Your Day in AI 33 (1995 in the common reckoning) (Your Day will come)

late November

Turkey Day, last Thursday in November (No Thanks, please)

25 December

Gifts-From-Us Day (who else would the gifts be from?) (often contracted to 'Gifsmus')

Authenticated, 28 February AI 27 Harlan B. Miller Archbullshop and CO